1. No: “Yes, I’d love to participate, and I’m going to have to decline.”

2. No with help: “I love that you thought of me, and I’m unable to participate. How can I help you find someone else?”

3. No with appreciation: “I think your idea is fabulous, and I’m not able to participate at this time.”

4. No and yes: “Yes, I’d love to participate, but at a later date. Can you ask me again in January?”

5. No with specific yes: “I’d love to help you with your project, and I’m on a
deadline until Tuesday. Can we meet on Wednesday?”

6. No when you don’t know: “Sounds interesting. I need to sleep on that”
OR “I need to check with my boss/partner.”

7. No with values: “If I take on another task right now, I wouldn’t be honouring my commitment to my [family] [work] [business].”

But perhaps the biggest tool in your kit is to nurture your ability to stop talking once you’ve said no. Take a look:

Tell the Truth

I really wanted to attend your party, but I was working late, and the kids had a meltdown when I came home and by the time things were calmed down it was too late. Besides, someone boxed me in and I couldn’t get out of my parking space even if I wanted to. I’m sorry if you were counting on me. How can I make it up to you?

Say No

I really don’t have the time to add one more thing to my plate, but I guess I have to do this. I mean it won’t look good if I don’t. I’m really working at
creating balance in my life right now. No thank you.

Stop Talking

I’m really working at creating balance in my life right now. No thank you. I
mean, I’d really love to take on this project, and I know you’re going to be
disappointed in me, but I just feel really overwhelmed, and if I take on one
more project I think my boss will fire me. You’re not mad are you? Oh heck,
just give it to me, I can do it. I don’t know why I said no.